Off to college (II)
Madeline and her friends start heading to college tomorrow. As I discovered when John went away a couple of years ago, this time away is to be a leisurely search for the wisdom of life - it must be true because a college professor told it to me.
I repeat myself from a previous post but Aristotle is always worth repeating: "the first principle of all (good) action is leisure." This is supposed to be leisurely learning before you enter the work force for the rest of your life.
Another wise man worth repeating is my father-in-law, who explained to his three sons on the day I married his daughter: "Girls are different." Twenty years of parenting have reinforced this simple truth to me. The rules for boys and girls are different. So the advice for boys and girls should be different as well.
Thoughts for my daughter as she heads to school:
NEVER let a boy (or anyone else) define you - You define yourself. Set yourself apart and above the rest. It will pay off throughout life.
Learn the difference between a skeptic and a cynic - It will be valuable if you position yourself as a skeptic. Skeptics require proof. . .proof of claims made by either a professor or scholar. The cynic can consider no proof and has given up.
Lose the cell phone every now and then - There is a disconnectedness that comes from being constantly connected to those far away. Enjoy what is in front of you.
Get lost in the library - Read, study, enjoy some quiet. You will learn to love it.
Immerse yourself in subjects - You are paying for this experience; get every cent from it.
Never just exist - Existing isn't nearly as fun as experiencing. Experience this time.
Be kind to people - It is easier than being mean and you will be amazed by the results.
Hang around good people - It is a habit that will pay off throughout life.
Mind your health - Not just to avoid the "freshman 15" but to think better and perform. Walk, run, exercise. Eat some salads too.
Take pride in a job well done - An essay well written, a test nailed, a compelling presentation that is rehearsed and delivered well. . .take pride in these things.
Collaborate - Learn to work with others. Study together, read each other's work, provide helpful feedback. Work together.
Enjoy yourself - Learning comes much more easily when you try to enjoy it. After this experience is over, you will never wish that your fretted more.
I repeat myself from a previous post but Aristotle is always worth repeating: "the first principle of all (good) action is leisure." This is supposed to be leisurely learning before you enter the work force for the rest of your life.
Another wise man worth repeating is my father-in-law, who explained to his three sons on the day I married his daughter: "Girls are different." Twenty years of parenting have reinforced this simple truth to me. The rules for boys and girls are different. So the advice for boys and girls should be different as well.
Thoughts for my daughter as she heads to school:
NEVER let a boy (or anyone else) define you - You define yourself. Set yourself apart and above the rest. It will pay off throughout life.
Learn the difference between a skeptic and a cynic - It will be valuable if you position yourself as a skeptic. Skeptics require proof. . .proof of claims made by either a professor or scholar. The cynic can consider no proof and has given up.
Lose the cell phone every now and then - There is a disconnectedness that comes from being constantly connected to those far away. Enjoy what is in front of you.
Get lost in the library - Read, study, enjoy some quiet. You will learn to love it.
Immerse yourself in subjects - You are paying for this experience; get every cent from it.
Never just exist - Existing isn't nearly as fun as experiencing. Experience this time.
Be kind to people - It is easier than being mean and you will be amazed by the results.
Hang around good people - It is a habit that will pay off throughout life.
Mind your health - Not just to avoid the "freshman 15" but to think better and perform. Walk, run, exercise. Eat some salads too.
Take pride in a job well done - An essay well written, a test nailed, a compelling presentation that is rehearsed and delivered well. . .take pride in these things.
Collaborate - Learn to work with others. Study together, read each other's work, provide helpful feedback. Work together.
Enjoy yourself - Learning comes much more easily when you try to enjoy it. After this experience is over, you will never wish that your fretted more.



My advice to my boys was shorter: "Make the most of it. See how much you can achieve. Approach. Don't retreat." If I'd been talking to a daughter, I'd have added a proviso or two.
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Very good advice. I'll add that.
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Kurt:
Brilliant...shared it with my two sons, the younger of whom I just delivered to college to join his brother.
Here's a favorite poem that captures a bit of your themes:
I slept and dreamt
That Life was Joy
I woke and found
That Life was service
I Acted, and behold
Service was Joy
Rabindranath Tagore
(no couch potato, he)
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Thanks, David. Great poem.
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